Vindicate Page 9
Brady raised his hand to stop him. “You did more than I would have. It wouldn’t have stopped this. We’ve become so focused on fighting what’s in front of us that we don’t look ahead . Even if you had told us before , more than likely we would have been forced to wait until this hell came to listen to you.”
Nana brought toasted bread and a glass of water to me. I looked at Austin – remembering that morning he came to our house a few days ago – sending Landen to talk to him again. I was glad I went with my gut , that Landen learned what he did then, but I regretted not insisting that we come here or least sent someone here for them.
I’d finished my soup and was giving my stomach a rest before I attempted to eat the bread. “Who is this Bianca ? How is she in both our lives ? What does she want with them?” I asked Draven.
His strong jawline tighten ed as he stared at me. “She’s an Escort. Dark energy that is seeking power, she is in my life simpl y to destroy Charlie. She is in yours because she seeks powe r, enough power to dominate The Realm, to dominate the energy of this one.”
“Why , Charlie? Why does she want to hurt her?” I asked , realizing that from the point of view of those images the ghost of his mother had showed me , he was the one in danger ; y et, he believed every word he spoke as if it were the truth.
“Because the first one she wanted to rule with – partner with, was addicted to Charlie . When that failed , she came after me , and I turned her down. Bianca lusts after revenge just as much as she does men.”
“Who was addicted to her? How can you be addicted to someone?” Brady asked.
Draven leaned forward and looked down as his fingers moved rapidly against the table. It was like he wanted to speak through music, like if he had a guitar in his hand , we would f eel his words through the sound. I didn’t need a sound to feel the undeniable love he had for Charlie, the passion he had for the essence th at she was. “Charlie is the sun. She is wa rmth. She is…she is very addicting, and this other person knew her from before . She saved him then , and he wanted her to save him again.”
I knew from the lack of jealousy he had for this person he spoke of that he had no concern for him, but there was som eone he was worried about. Someone that not only evoked jealously , but every defensive emotion a soul could possess. I knew that emotion intimately. It was how I felt about Landen, how I felt when the thought of someone taking him from me came to mind.
Nana brought two plates with chocolate pie on them and sat them in front of Olivia and Brady . She returned with two more for Austin and Draven , then took my empty bowl and pushed the plate of toast closer.
“How do I get there?” I asked , breaking the bread apart , feeling hunger for the first time in days.
Draven’s eyes smiled at me. He had this essence about him, this pull of energy that almost commanded you to study every feature in his faultless image. He reminded me so much of Drake that I almost felt like I was talking to him.
“Not long ago Charlie forgot how to see. I taug ht her to find that curse again, but I’ve never managed to teach anyone who had never faced this darkness to see. I’m not sure I’d want to , ” h e said with a hint of a warning in his rhythmic voice.
“How did she forget?” Olivia asked. I felt her curiosity of Draven. I felt him leave her just as spellbound as he left me.
Anger swelled in Draven as he tensed. “It was a mind game by Bianca . She had the intent to blind Charlie , so she and Britain – the one that is addicted to Charlie - could feed off her energy, but Charlie is strong. She still has a few lost memories , but they’re there just under the surface.”
“Feed off her?” Brady said tightly , leaning protective ly toward me.
Draven nodded. “Off her energy ; that is what Escorts do. They find light in this life , and i t gives them power in The Realm. I n turn , it leaves this world darker , which also gives them power.”
Brady eyed at me. “We need to ask Perodine about this, these Escorts.”
“She knows what they are,” Draven said quickly. “On e took the one you call Donalt. No doubt there.”
“Why do you say that? How are you sure?” I asked , feeling how confident he was about that statement.
Draven’s eyes stared off in to empty space . As his thumb traced across the calluses on the tips of his fingers , he searched for words and fought the emotion of defeat. “Because…because that is exactly what Escorts do.” His jaw tightened , and I felt a disgust ri se in him. “They take the light. Dwindle it down into nothingness until what was once beautiful is turned into the horrid darkness that it is.”
Through that deep emotion , I thought I felt his heart aching. I thought I felt a degree of self -loathing. It was an emotion I would never allow anyone to feel in my presence. I reached for his hand , feeling a slight tingle of his energy, his magnetism. I tried to think like Landen – think of what he would say if he felt this emotion; how he would bring Draven to peace with the demons he was fighting in his soul. “There is a divide between darkness and light, and in that divide, in that space between , there are warriors, warriors that see both sides clearly…people like that, people like you and me , will save this world. We will end the timeless battle between darkness and ligh t. We’ll end it by showing the darkness that even they are worthy of feeling the power we feel, that they are loved despite the hell they bring.”
I looked down as I realized I was embracing the lesson August had tried to teach me a few hours ago. I smiled slightly as I remembered every time Landen had said my next words. “There is a reason for everything.” I pulled my hand from his. “Never doubt your heart. Love. Love of soul mates is divine , and it is tested every single moment of every day. You have to fight for it. If it’s not worth fighting for , then it’s not love.”
Draven smiled boyishly as he took ownership of the peace I’d tried to give him. “You said it just as poetically as he does . I f he heard you just now , it would have made him smile , revealing those dimples you tend to stare at.”
My eyes glassed over as I craved Landen. I ached for the moment I would see him smile again. “You really can see everything in my past?” I murmured .
His magnetic emerald eyes peered into mine. “Within your existence.”
I felt a surge of energy soar through me. “Everything ? Even before – before ?”
He nodded as his eyes and soul filled with sympathy. “You carry the soul of a w arrior and the heart of a queen. I’m humbled by the quest I see in your past. By Landen , ” h e looked down , hiding his eyes , “by Drake.”
I swallowed hard. Before – before this moment , before Landen was taken from me , I would have pulled Draven aside and begg ed him to tell me every detail. Every word I’d spoken to each of them. But the funny thing is sometimes when you g et what you ask for - you no longer want it. I didn’t want to know what was said or done in my forgotten lifetimes. I t didn’t matter. My soul was one with Landen’s . Our existence was one source of energy – even if my heart had felt compassion for Drake , it was a far cry from that kind of knowledge.
I pushed the empty pla te that had bread on it farther from me and glanced at my side at Brady. He was warily looking over me , questioning the thoughts in my mind.
“I want him back . Now , ” I said , looking into Brady’s blue eyes , wishing with every ounce of my soul that they were Landen’s.
I felt a relief rise inside of Brady. He had seen me refuse to question my past with Drake; he had seen my thoug hts tie around his baby brother. Though he hoped that I would save them both , he was grasping the thought that without a doubt , I would save Landen. At first I was angry by the doubt he must have had, but then I realized that he did n’t doubt that I loved Landen. He had doubted that I would ha ve the will to save myself .
Brady looked at Draven. “What can you do for us there ? I s taking you to Esterious a wise thing to do?”
“Why would it not be wise?” I said , knowing they were going one way or another. They were my answer
.
“That dimension is bo und to be full of damned souls. They are like magnets to them , ” Austin said as he mirrored Brady’s concern. His caution was refreshing and soothing , the way Landen’s always was.
“If anyone is a magnet for damned souls , it’s me , ” I promised , knowing nothing they could see or attract could be worse tha n the demon that wa s tormenting me.
“We’ll be fine,” Draven promised. “We knew we would be there one day anyway . Show me w h ere they lay , and I will be able to see where they are in their minds. If I can’t teach you to see , at least I can tell you what they need.” He cleared his throat. “What energy they need , ” h e said as he glanced at me , then looked back at Brady. “This is going to be harder than it sounds. I can go there in an instant , but what I see and what they see are going to be different. I’ll do what I can to steer them , but it would be better if one of you were there, one of you that they trust and will listen to. The dark energy in that place h as been feeding them illusions. Toying with their doubts , ” his eyes met mine again , “s eeing someone –feeling someone that they trust , l ove , will make more of a difference than I could ever hope to .” His eyes locked with mine. I felt a dread within him. He didn’t think this war was going to be easy.
Brady and Olivia both glanced at me , then back to Draven. I felt Nana’s hand on my shoulder. “Willow will grasp this.”
I looked up at her , then she rested her hand under my chin as she turned my head from side to side. “You look better . One more bowl of soup.”
I thought about arguing with her as she went to get it , but I knew from her intent that was a foolish quest. I decided just to eat as fast as I could ; I was beyond eager to get back and end this.
“Where are Charlie and Madison?” I asked , knowing they weren’t t here and that the others would not leave without them.
Draven’s jaw tightened . “Saying their goodbyes.” The jealousy I knew I felt before surfaced in his soul.
“But the y’re not to you , ” I said to him , trying to comfort the emotion I knew all too well.
He tried to smile. “Not yet , ” h e said under his breath.
Nana s e t a fresh bowl of soup down in front of me. “Draven – you need to make sure you’re packed . Take at least one guitar in case you need it to help you work through what you see.” She looked at the others as her hand rested on my shoulder. “All of you can go and make sure the others are ready so when Charlie and Madison get back you can leave.”
Austin and Draven stood as if they knew it was foolish to argue with Nana’s request to leave. Brady and Olivia sat as still as statues at my side. Nana took Draven’s seat as she stared at Brady. “Now, this would be one of those moments that your mother, or the beautiful woman you love called Felicity , would tell you was girl time –just before they pushed you out the door.”
Brady smiled politely. “Felicity would not want me to leave her side , ” h e promised , glancing at me.
“Did she not tell you to not let your stubbornness get in the way, to give way to the time Willow needed and to make sure that she had everything she needed to survive ?”
Brady nodded , feeling somewhat invaded that a private conversation he had was now seen by someone he barely knew.
“She needs this if she’s going to survive , ” Nana promised .
He pushed back his chair back. “You call my name if you need me , ” h e said , putting his hand on my shoulder. Olivia stood with the intent of not letting Nana repeat any private conversati ons she may have had about me. Brady hesitated as he looked at the window behind him. “If you plan on making her mad , I would suggest you move away from the window.”
Nana grinned. “Understood.”
As they left the room , I stole a few mor e sips of my soup. I felt vacant , like it didn’t matter what I ate ; at th at point , I would still be famished . Nana didn’t say a word until my bowl was empty.
“Now…what did he tell you ? How did he tell you to remain strong?” s he asked , already knowing the answer.
“Landen?” I said as the sound of his name pierced through my chest.
She nodded.
“To think of us , ” I whispered as my eyes stared into the past.
She nodded. “And why are we not doing that?”
I shrugged my shoulders. “I guess I was too hungry to think of that , ” I said in a sly attempt to thank her for taking care of me.
I breathed in deeply and closed my eyes. I let memories rush me back, back to the beginning. Our first kiss …the first time he held me in a passionate embrace. His words . His soothing energy. Then I remembered his energy falling into mine, the addicting sensation of how astounding it felt when we were truly one. I felt his power, our power , course through my soul. I took a deeper breath , feeling life come back to me. I was wide-awake , full of energy and determination. I opened my eyes to see Nana smiling at me.
“Did you – did you just see all of that?” I asked , feeling my cheeks turn crimson. Frantically I twirled my ring, letting my nail slice into my tender skin. Control. I had it. At least for this moment.
“No,” she promised , echoing truth.
“I don’t understand this seeing thing.”
She folded her hands in front of her. “Seeing the living is hard ; all you can see is their perception . I f you’re wise , you will look around them and find your own conclusions. The dead are simpler ; they have no secrets.” She sighed. “Don’t worry about anyone seeing what you don’t want them to – if you hide it from yourself , you hide it from them. Your deeply personal thoughts are locked in a vault in your mind w h ere only you and the one that created them can see.”
“Madison couldn’t see me, how come?” I asked , understanding the frustration she must have with me . I t had to be like not feeling Drake, or any dark soul in Esterious.
“I would consider that a blessing , ” Nana said , trying to smile. “Sometimes our souls are wise and blind us from what we should not see. I don’t think it’s a good idea for either of yo u to see each other now or ever.” Her eyes danced across my face. “I understand Scorpios are a bit jealous.”
“She’s a Scorpio?” I said with a smirk . I was so right about her. “What would I feel if I could feel her?” I asked carefully.
“A very confused girl who is hiding from her fate.”
Sounds familiar. “Why? Why does she hide?”
“Would you not hide from yours if you had the choice?”
Lying was a reflex. “I had a choice . I faced it.”
“Not in this life, Willow. Whether you believe it or not , you felt connected to Drake long before your nightmares had a face.”
I couldn ’t overcome how eerie it was that she knew so much about me. I felt v ul nerable , and I didn’t like it at all. “What you just said to me , ” I nodded toward the doorway that Brady and Olivia had left , “w hat you just did to Brady – that could be seen as an invasion of privacy. Some people may not want you to med d l e in their thoughts.”
I felt her intent to choose her words more carefully around me . I felt bad for causing her to put up that wall. When did I become so rude? If my mother knew I was acting like this I would never hear the end of it.
“True . One would argue that feeling others ’ emotions, seeing intent, feeling truth could be an invasion as well.”
“Very true,” I said , smiling for the first time since Landen had left. “I’ve said that before.”
“Right.”
“You see my past – do you see a different choice I could have ever made ?” I asked , daring to know if that were the case.
Her eyes fell to my chest to where the blade had pierced my heart , t hen they rose to meet mine. “No. You have made choices that no one should ever be asked to, and as my grandson so poetically said , you made them with the grace of a queen an d the heart of a warrior. You prevailed.”
“I’m not a queen , ” I said gruffly , know ing that fate had given that title t
o Madison . Whether she liked it or not.
“Yes , you are . I n your heart , you are a queen , and your king needs you to be strong – to fight for him.”
I felt a familiar anger rumble inside of me , then reflect in the sound of thunder. “If you truly see me , then you know it is Landen , not Drake , that I love with my soul.” I let out a breath as I dug my nail into my skin. I didn’t mean to let that emotion slip out.
“Correct , ” s he said , looking to the window , then to me. “But right now – you are going to have to save them both…you are going to have to do this because I don’t think Madison is ready for your world.”
She said save not love. It felt so good to hear that . “She is the one , ” I stated bleakly. “Fate demands that she helps me with this.”
Nana tried to smile , but the concern in her eyes wouldn ’t let her. “Neither you or I know that for sure ; only they will.”
“Why do you think she is not ready ?” I asked . Maybe it was me. Maybe Madison knew I tried to love them both. That would make me mad if the tables were reversed.
“Because I know who is in her dreams. I know the destiny she is refusing to seek. I know that she has herself consumed with Charlie’s fate – with Draven’s , but truth is that all of you, every last one of you , need each other.”
“What is going on with Charlie?” I asked . To me that girl looked solid as rock. Like someone I would need in my life.
Nana held my gaze. “Charlie mad e a choice many, many years ago. She chose Draven’s soul, and the one she left behind wants nothing more than for her to…reconsider.”
“Sounds familiar , ” I mumbled .
Nana laughed under her breath. “You remind me of her ; in fact , you are a perfect combination of both her and Madison . The only diffe rence is your soul is old – more focused on your intent.”
“If she lived many years ago , she is an old soul , ” I corrected respectfully. Not to mention it was clear to me that her intent was to help Draven through his hell.