Emanate: Insight Series ((Insight) Web of Hearts and Souls) Read online

  I could see a paved road before us. It was made of white pebbles that glistened like diamonds. The setting beyond that point was soul-seizing. The buildings were made of perfectly placed jagged tan stones that created the most welcoming energy. I felt as if I were walking into a historic palace, or even a perfectly aged campus—the regal knowledge and serenity in the air was so calming that at that moment I’d forgotten what fear was.

  There were gardens and small ponds everywhere, the colors of each glowing, bringing forth shades I’d never seen. I could see bell towers; they were perched high above the structures on every corner. The windows in this place, each massive, were all made of stained glass and were framed so perfectly that you could see the story of the colors. The artist in me was yearning to walk through the streets before me, to take in the living art that each building surely was.

  Massive trees that any child would be drawn to climb were everywhere. I could see myself easily lounging on or under the wide branches with a sketchbook in hand.

  Somehow, oddly, the beauty seemed incomplete, as if it were the entryway to something that was never built. I could see massive trees outlining the place—I mean colossal—the trunks as wide as our house. I would swear that each one was stretching to the stars themselves. Nothing seemed to fit together, yet it did, only it was incomplete.

  We were not alone here. More of the silent warriors that were behind us were ahead, and women, beautiful women stood with them. We walked closer to the royal structures before us, and from one of the towering walls, behind massive windows that were pulled open, I saw a familiar face. I saw several familiar faces. August, Brady, Ashten, my father, and Justus stood there.

  “Dad,” I breathed.

  I swear he could hear my voice from his distance. He broke his rank from the others and turned inside, surely to make his way down to me. Justus held my stare as I walked closer; an unmistakable glimmer of pride and honor were in his stoic gray eyes.

  All but our family above us bowed their heads as we passed.

  “Where is everyone else?”

  “Marc and Chrispin are with Drake, as well as Stella. Dane and Clarissa, I assume, are in The Realm. I sense Olivia and Felicity,” he said with a nod.

  “I don’t like the way they are looking at us,” I said as my father approached me with a grave stare in his eyes.

  I sensed my mother and looked to the window he had come from. There, I saw Olivia and Aubrey standing with her.

  “Don’t let them scare you…they have just been waiting a long time to see us here.”

  He met my stare as I lifted my eyes to him. Before I could ask him why, my father approached us.

  I could hear my father say my name, but it was muffled. Landen answered him for me. My father threw a harsh glance over his shoulder at Justus.

  I felt that unbridled maternal sensation rise again in my soul. “He did not do this to me.”

  My father offered a nod and said something to Landen.

  “He says there is nothing physically wrong with you, that this is a mental block,” Landen translated.

  “That look in your eye, your dark eyes…is that fear…or is it regret? Did you not want me?” I asked my father. I could not clearly hear my voice, but I had no doubt my tone was that of the child in me he once knew.

  My father put his hands on his hips and lowered his head. I saw him breathe in, as if he were trying to put on a calm front.

  His eyes rose to meet Landen’s.

  “He says that when he was told by Justus what his daughter would be, what she would become, he was humbled, and terrified, afraid that he could not protect her. He thought that his blood, his life was not royal enough to be given such a gift. He was just a boy when those fears were felt and spoken. He could never regret one moment of your life. You brought him joy from the first moment he saw your heart beat in your mother’s womb.”

  “How…how can you hear him?”

  “You father was…is, a Rampart Warrior. Here, we can all sense each other. We can react to the static emotions in the air. Because I was Guardian…because of the transformation before us, he can speak to me at any time without words, if I allow him that conference.”

  “Why can I not hear him?” I asked as I let go of Landen and reached for my father and hugged him as tightly as I could. I could sense the vibration of love and honor sniping the air. I could almost swear this place was a mirror to the gifts that both Landen and I shared.

  “You have to listen to that voice deep inside to find your way back.”

  I knew those were my father’s words once again, but how deeply and slowly Landen spoke them led me to assume that he believed the same.

  When I became anxious, simply because everyone seemed to be aware of my internal war, my father held me tighter, as if he could feel it. All at once, all those that had stood star-struck around us turned to go about whatever they were doing before we arrived.

  My father let me go, purposely placing my hand back in Landen’s.

  “Tell me what the risk is, Landen. What do I have to do to fix whatever you are worried about, whatever everyone else is worried about?”

  When he didn’t answer, I looked up to see his gaze, which was locked on the wall of massive trees whose trunks were larger than the home we lived in.

  “I’ll be right back.”

  “What? No! I’m coming.”

  “It’s just Marc and Phoenix.”

  “Why are they together?”

  “Good question.”

  “I’m coming.”

  “That’s the Veil, Willow. Just beyond there. That is death. That is every reason to have fear in the first place.”

  It was a demand that I stay behind, a humble plea. Landen didn’t want me to fight any more anxious emotions than I was already dealing with.

  Justus had arrived at my side. Everyone else I knew, with the exception of our mothers and Olivia, was heading toward those trees.

  I didn’t have to hear Landen to know that he had told Justus to stay with me. I missed anger right now. I missed how it empowered my stubbornness. I felt the urge to follow him. I wanted to, but I stayed. I stood right at Justus’ side as I watched Landen literally walk through a tree with the rest of the warriors, my father included.

  I glanced up at Justus. “What is going on?”

  “He’s just filling his role as the ambassador of our world.”

  “Then shouldn’t I be with him?”

  “No doubt, but right now you are both coming to terms with what is expected of you.”

  “I don’t know what is expected of me. That’s the issue…I’m scared to understand it at this point. He keeps leaving me behind.”

  “Then maybe you need to tell him that you, your soul, wants nothing more than to be with him.”

  “He should already know that.” What could I have done to make him think otherwise?

  “I can’t speak for him, Sovereign. No one can understand what either of you are going through; we can only hope that you prevail.”

  He nodded his head for me to follow him as he began to lead me closer to the regal buildings.

  “What is this place, Justus?”

  “The buildings?”

  “All of it.”

  “This is Radiance. The home of Aliyanna and Guardian.” He glanced forward at the distant waterfall that was moving in the wrong direction, then said, “Or it was.”

  “This place cannot be four million years old.”

  “Just over that mark, actually.”

  “You’re saying I lived here? I don’t understand why this was never shown to me, why the Chara I saw mocked the one I was raised in, with the exception of everyone following their dreams, living their dreams.”

  He shrugged. “Maybe Landen was trying to ease you into the magic of this place. It can be overwhelming, even in the best of circumstances.”

  “I feel the gravity of it.”

  “Most say that. It’s not gravity, though. It’s you. This place ce
nters you, but its path to find that center is not always an easy one.”

  “Is that why I keep getting flashbacks of the last few months?” I had been ignoring as many of those as I could, but the fear they left behind was chilling my bones.

  “Perhaps.”

  “Did he mean it? That is the Veil—and just behind that is Esterious?”

  “The Veil somewhat lingers across all dimensions. It is thicker right there, but yeah, with a good set of eyes on a clear day, you could see the gray haze of Esterious’ borders just beyond that rampart.”

  “Are you telling me that the heart of Chara, the founding land, the part that is most magical, the part that obviously has to be fiercely protected, is in the most vulnerable place in Chara? That it is literally back-to-back with our enemy?”

  He raised his brow. “In a sense. To be fair, there was a wider berth at one time, a few thousand miles at least. Time moved the rampart closer.”

  He casually walked me over to one of the beautiful trees with wide, low lying branches and sat down on a stone bench before it. Before I sat down, I stared at the stained glass window just behind it. The rays of light, the red and darkness with the white pane down the center seemed to amplify what I was learning of this place. It almost looked as if it were depicting the story of Creation.

  I needed to sketch. I really did. I fisted my hands, knowing that the time for that passion had long since left my life.

  “I want to know why I can hear you. Only you. I want to know why this place was kept from me. Why Landen fears it.”

  “I cannot, and will not, speak for Landen or his actions,” Justus said as he leaned his arms on his knees, then rolled his shoulders and tilted his head toward me. A slow smile, which managed to show innocence in this clearly valiant warrior, emerged.

  As I stared at him, I saw echoes of his life. Most of them, the ones here as he grew up at my father’s side, were full of laughter. The kind of laughter that made your sides hurt, tears creep to the corners of your eyes. He was by nature full of joy, but something had triggered this stoic image before me now. It may have been age, life itself, or the call to battle that created it, but nevertheless as I stared at him, watched these images that I should not be able to perceive come to life, I not only felt envy for that joy, but grief that neither he nor I would feel that way again.

  His smile fell as his eyes rapidly moved across my image, as if he were reading an epic novel. He let out a short breath, hiding a curse he’d rather not let me hear. “Grief and envy. You’re up to four emotions; maybe you should work on finding a few more positive ones,” he said with a raised brow and half-smile.

  “Love is positive,” I stated as I saw with my own eyes the sacrifices he had made in his life, the decisions he’d made not only to commit to a woman he despised, but block his heart from feeling a call to the illusive woman who was surely holding half his soul—all in the name of protecting me, protecting this family, this world.

  “You are only feeling the dark side of love.”

  “There is no dark side,” I promised him, as if he were the child my defiant emotions thought he was.

  “Douse it in an emotion like grief, anger, and envy, and it becomes pretty morbid.”

  I glanced across the garden to the streets a few feet away. I focused on a few people and tried to feel their intentions, their emotions, even hear their chatter as their lips moved. Nothing.

  “I feel isolated.”

  “Your soul is emerging,” he stated evenly as his gray eyes pinned me where I stood. “The lack of sound is odd, I will grant you that, but some higher power has decided right now that you only need to hear yourself…inner focus.”

  More and more flashes of his life were coming to me. Justus not only enjoyed humor, he was a philosopher. I saw him at August’s side, a young boy debating endless mythology. This boy was layers deep, layers that I was almost positive I knew as well as my own life.

  If I had chosen a First for myself, or attracted one to me, I was not surprised that I attracted a philosopher, one who was quiet and peaceful—that is, until you crossed them and they became lethal. All the men I admired in my life were that way.

  “How can a trial that should happen in Esterious have anything to do with Chara? Those trials were based on a web of hearts, where I chose whom to love, right?”

  “Trial, curse, spell, you can call it whatever you wish, Sovereign, the purpose of the action was to take you down.” He leaned further forward as he gazed at the forest Landen had vanished into. “You are the only one who can bring Donalt’s true death, the end to his reign…and he will stop at nothing to prevent that from happening. He has no fear of time, for he has lived for countless eternities. You’re near the end of your path. You are weaker than ever before, and he knows that.”

  That really wasn’t news to me, but instead of hearing those words as a girl who had looked Donalt in the eye more times than I care to remember, I heard them as a girl who had never faced that demon, the evil he was. I felt myself tremble.

  “What did I do to make him hate me so much?” My voice rose insistently.

  “You were created, you were chosen. You are the solution to the problem he is.”

  “Is that mythology you’re speaking?”

  “Your words, Sovereign.”

  “It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve lied to myself or seen something as it wasn’t.”

  I raised my fingertips to my temple, trying to stop the flashbacks. I could not believe how vivid they were, how one thought could pull me so deep into the past, how my body would react to a thought as if the challenge were before me at that very moment.

  One second I was proud of the bravery I had displayed, the next I was embarrassed by my actions. Underneath it all, I was terrified, terrified that I had neglected to see the whole story.

  “I would agree,” Justus nearly whispered to me, “but we were not alone when you spoke them to me. No one can lie in the light of the divine power that was present with us. Your path was made visible by him.”

  I dared to let a shy smile emerge. “I saw the path and still managed to fall in every pitfall.”

  “Free will,” Justus breathed. “To choose once, or for the first time, is a strong statement, but to choose the same path secondly, blindly, is beyond powerful. Your path made you strong. It wasn’t a mistake.” After a moment of silence, he spoke again. “You are not the only one twisted in these Earthly games; Donalt has a web of his own to undo.”

  “Like killing me, or taking over Drake so he can have my heart?”

  “It wasn’t your heart. It was your soul, the essence of who you are—what you give to the one that completes you. Mere love would not have been enough. Donalt could not understand that, for he has never felt the emotion. I have no doubt that he thought that by placing you and Drake’s souls close together over and over that the two of you would become a habit, an addiction to one another; that is not love. There are more stratums than the triangle that has surrounded you for the last few months.”

  “Never underestimate a determined woman. No more triangle. I found Madison.”

  His eyes angled to the side at me as a playful smirk emerged. “Right. Donalt meant to hinder you, but all he did was force you to bring powerful souls together. Bravo.”

  “Powerful souls,” I repeated with a nod of agreement.

  “Sovereign…there is a war in the heavens now, and its fate rests on the one we are fighting here…the victory rests on seven souls that were chosen to fight this, to become the solution.”

  “The seven lights?”

  He raised his brow, clearly choosing his words carefully. “Parts of the souls are light, just as parts of them are dark…souls are made of two. Seven souls of both light and dark will bring rapture to the emotions of all beings.”

  I swallowed nervously. I had heard Landen and Phoenix mention this to me, but at the time I was in serious pain and could not comprehend what was happening around me. All I knew was that I
was almost sure that Phoenix’s scarf girl was part of that. I was pretty sure that Charlie was, but I never reasoned that I was, which was making me feel like a fool right about now. I had brought powerful souls together. At the time, I thought their purpose was to help me end Donalt. Looking back at how things have played out I’m thinking maybe not—maybe we all had our own evil to fight.

  “What does my war with Donalt have to do with these kings? Or Charlie’s war with Xavier?”

  “Donalt is one of them—so is Xavier. The current kings must fall.”

  A deep grief that flooded my senses with both the aroma of warm honey and oddly mint came to me. I didn’t know how I knew, but I knew I didn’t want all the kings to fall. I knew they were not all malice. For all I knew, they were misunderstood, just as I have been.

  On top of that notion, I wasn’t a fan of knowing that I had brought Charlie and Draven to Xavier’s doorstep.

  “I was not designed to rule people. I mean that in the most humble way possible.”

  He gave me one nod, clearly stating that he still felt like he was talking to my soul, and not my ego.

  “It’s not about people. It’s about emotions. And you will rule the one emotion that you cannot handle currently. Donalt is the current King of Fear. Obviously, he needs to be replaced.”

  “These current kings rule emotions?”

  “They do. They have legions of souls at their command whom were made to reprieve man from consuming negative emotions in their rare form. Currently, they don’t reprieve, they invoke, cause the emotion so they can feel the high of the energy. They’ve twisted their purpose, which is why they must fall. I can’t explain to you how powerful they are, how powerful you will be. Just know that you’re meant for greatness. Taking fear from souls empowers them to move this universe to enlightenment.”

  I looked calm and collected on the outside, but on the inside I was in shock. It almost made sense that this was supposed to be my end game. Emotions had always been my thing. Either sensing them or changing them, one way or another I was always highly aware of feelings. I’ve craved taking away the dark emotions since before I could remember.